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Monday, May 28, 2007

Our high-stakes poker game

Last Thursday I spoke with the oncologist's office to get a better understanding of cachexia and how to deal with it. As I described Jeseca's condition, they confirmed that it was indeed cachexia, and began explaining the different stages and what we should expect next. The outlook is grim. They expect Jes to slip into a coma shortly, and then, when she can no longer eat anything......well, you know. We ordered a supplement that is supposed to lessen the effects of cachexia and are praying it helps (when we finally receive it -- it's been nearly two weeks).

Jeseca is just like me; she wants to know everything the doctors have to say. So we discussed it all Thursday and Friday night, trying to wrap our heads around everything; trying to understand what God is doing, what we have yet to do or plan for, and how we never imagined it would ever get to this point.

But it has. We're staring death in the face right now, and no man-made solution can make a difference. We're too far along in the game at this point. What we need is a "Wooo!" miracle. The stage is certainly set, and I will continue to hold to the hope we have and the promise we believe we have heard until God proves otherwise. And even then, if we have heard wrong, I trust that God will help me remain faithful to Him as I face a life without my very best friend and love, the mother of our two young men, my heart's eternal companion.

But I don't think we've heard wrong.

God is our strength and our shield, our comfort now. And He can do the impossible. The doctors have said that Jeseca will die soon. Those are the cards we hold now. But God is in our corner, and we're all-in. To God be the glory. JG

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posted by Jon Graves at 5:34 AM 4 comments links to this post

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