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Saturday, April 28, 2007

The mystery of God

I don't quite know what to say tonight. Sometimes I get caught up in the hope that God is going to heal Jes that I lose touch with what is really going on in the present. I continue to believe that God will heal her, but she continues to suffer.

It's no easy task to watch her go through all of this and know that I can't do anything about it. I can give her a back massage, but I can't make the pain in her lower back go away. I can pray for her to breathe each night, but I can't open up her windpipe or wipe away the tumors in her chest. I can help around the house so she doesn't have to do everything, but still she is fatigued. I can hold on to the hope we have in Jesus, but I can't speed up the process. It's tough.

I've talked so much about Jeseca's courage in the past; it remains remarkable to this day. She is absolutely amazing. She is positive even through the pain, telling everyone who asks that things are getting better. I honestly don't know that her condition matches her words, but how could I ever betray her feelings or doubt what she says is happening in her body?

I've contemplated putting together a video request for prayer for her. Nothing fancy (clearly), just a humble plea for help from anyone listening. I'll see what I can put together.

... ... ... ... (thinking)

In the face of all of this, God has proven Himself worthy of praise and worship. Since August of 2006, when we received the results of this PET Scan, we've lived with the understanding that, at least according to the doctors, Jeseca will die someday soon. Nine months later, she is still here teaching our boys about the grace and love of God, and we continue to plan for a future filled with crazy love, fun times and fantastic travel. That can only be credited to the hope we have in God, the faith He's given us for this period in our lives, and the extraordinary love He has for my wife.

... ... ... ...

I have labored away trying to find the right words tonight. As I've thought about everything, God has once again shown me that He is impossible to figure out, but He never fails to come through.

I know I will never understand the mysteries of God, but He is fully worth discovering. JG

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posted by Jon Graves at 10:18 PM 0 comments links to this post

Friday, April 27, 2007

Tee shot travesty

I am officially a wannabe golfer. With very little time to practice and a tee shot that could go anywhere at any time (like in the water or out of bounds at the most inopportune time), my game is bad. Last time out: 80 with a snowman. My handicap is 2, but for what I want to do, that amounts to 10+. No good. In fact, that's shake-your-head bad.

For all who are interested in hearing about Jeseca (and I know that's most of you), an update is coming. I just had to shake things up a bit and actually tell you about what's happening in my life...you know, the "Life and Times of Jon Graves."

posted by Jon Graves at 9:31 PM 0 comments links to this post

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